‘You used that C word.’ ‘I’m allowed to use cunt but not Christ,’ Ted whispered to me, but not softly enough. ‘Ted!’ I arrived in a tight white T-shirt and very tight jeans to impress Erin, but seemed to only have caught Ted’s eye. ‘You may need your jacket,’ Erin said, ‘You look rather undressed.’ ‘Mom, that’s Saturday gear for guys these days. Get up to speed.’ ‘We have our own standards, thank you dear, don’t we Ted.’ Smart Ted gave that stock reply that has served husbands for generations: ‘If you say so dear.’ I handed Ted a bottle of Johnny Walker Black Label whisky and gratification on his face matched his warm thanks. We sat in the lounge for the inquisition. ‘Well, Mike…’ began Erin but Nancy jumped up and offered everyone a glass of wine. ‘Perhaps we should wait until the end of this…’ Erin appeared to be going to say ‘interview’, but stopped. ‘Inquisition?’ suggested Nancy helpfully and received a withering look. Time for a John Wayne example of disregard for polite. He reached his hand out and touched the dragon, tracing its outline across her rippling six-pack, and come to rest on her belt buckle, 'Very nice job, where did you get this done'? he asked, still with his finger on her belt buckle, and as I looked I could see her skin flex as if he was prodding her and trying to venture further down, chasing the tail, and where it rested.There was an awkward silence, lasting only for a moment, when my niece, thrusting her hips against her finger said, 'Can you do my pussy'?Of the three of us I was the one taken aback, I noticed they were challenging each other, and as a rueful smile slowly spread across his face, his finger had momentarily dipped below her denims as she pushed in towards him.Noting my gaze on his finger he pulled out, coughed and asked exactly what it was she wanted done to her.'I want a piercing', she said, adding, 'In my clit' He looked at her, 'How old are you, you do know there is an age thing to contend with', he added, looking.
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